I am still unable to get my Twitter going on my Blackberry for these Sunday games. A buddy of mine said I should report my feelings throughout Sunday since all we do is intensely watch every moment of every game, but my Twitter app is crap. Not to mention the hundreds of phones being scanned for statistics within one room. Maybe I’ll kick it at home next Sunday. If anybody has a good Twitter app they use that is better than my TwitterBerry please feel free to endulge me. As for now, here’s my rundown of a monsterous week in Fantasy Football.
First off, I think I am done trying to predict what the ‘Skins are going to do, because it seems as if they don’t even know what to do themselves. Daniel Snyder has held up the process in D.C. for too many years now that it’s becoming a gambler’s nightmare. He just looks like a trust fund dork that throws his money around like a billionaire in a mexican whorehouse. If he can spend all this money on big names, then why the hell is Jason Campbell still behind center? Something has to change there.
Being from Kansas City it looks as if its going to be a long season from a fan stand point. So after getting tired of watching Todd Haley manage a game we turned to the Houston vs. Tennessee game which looked like a good ol’ fashioned shootout. Exactly the way I like it. They were still in the first quarter while most of the other early games were at halftime. Passing on Chris Johnson at pick 12 could have been the biggest mistake I have ever made in Fantasy Football. He’s as sexy a girl dressed in body paint. See what I mean? The man had 40 points by halftime and capped his day off with a third quarter sprint for 91 yards. That’s enough to make owners cum in their pants as far as I’m concerned.
Not a Dolphins fan? Try now!
By the way, this is not a PG-13 blog so if you have ear muffs or eye masks……..use them!
Same game, different squad. My boy Matt Schaub who I have in all four of my leagues showed up. Too bad I sat him in 3 out of 4, but still it’s very encouraging. I guess the Jets are for real. Andre Johnson also proved he was worthy of that first round pick you spent on him coming through in a big way with 10 catches for 149 and 2TDs including a 72-yard bomb on a play-action pass that totally miffed the Titans secondary. Good stuff.
Back to the J-E-T-S, Jets Jets Jets. I think Rex Ryan might be the last guy you want to run into at a bathroom stall. He’d kick you and your buddies ass faster than you can even say Sea Bass. And it seems to be rubbing off in New York, because they look like a team that thinks they are going to Miami. They may be tough to predict fantasy-wise, but if you had the guts to take their D in round 11 in your draft like I have seen, it seems to be paying off. Brady didn’t even throw a touchdown and I have never seen a team make him look like that.
Sea Bass ain't got nothing on Rex Ryan
What else….hmmmmmmmm! Oh yeah, the Saints are legit. I would be perfectly content with playing a lineup of all Saints, especially if Reggie is getting the ‘after-the-game is already over and we can sit on the sidelines and check out hot chicks in the stands’ points. I know he fell quite a bit this year, but there are enough touches to go around and he is still returning punts. Very dangerous. And my prediction about Colston was almost spot on.
I also hit on Cincy, not only by saying they would win the game and Chad would be able to do his Lambeau Leap, which he did, but I also stated that Greg Jennings would not show up. I think the fact that he DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A CATCH, justifies my statement. Chris Henry only ended up with one catch, but it was a touchdown so I’ll take half credit.
Moving to the late games, I will retract my statement about the Forty Niners as they looked like a team that was tired of being the NFC Wests’ bitch the last five seasons. Funny that I tried trading for Frank Gore all week and got nothing. Now I’m really screwed. He also single-handedly beat me in my big money league. His second 80 yard scamper was about the same time I spilled my beer all over our table and the front of my pants. Damn you Seahawks. Good to see Cutler back as well, taking down the Champs. Only a guy with that rich-kid swagger could pull that off.
Did you see Ray Lewis stuff Darren Sproles on 4th down to win the game? One of the most amazing plays I have ever seen. He was possessed. The man could have ran through a building to get to “The Little Tank” if he had to. Fucking awesome.
And lastly, the showdown at ‘The Palace’ was a game that pretty much told the story of week 2. Big plays, big points, and big screens. The new Dallas Stadium brought in over 105,000 in it’s debut for Jerry Jones and the ‘Boys (hopefully everybody bought a hotdog) and everything was just about perfect until Eli Cool methodically led his team down the field in the final minutes. That’s how you win a ballgame and that’s how you shut up a lot of people. Unfortunately, nobody punted the ball into the giant billboard TV up there. I gotta make a road trip down to Big D to see this thing. It’s a fucking landmark. Oh, and Brandon Jacobs…I can’t sleep at night because I keep playing draft night over in my mind when I was a millisecond away from picking Chris Johnson over your ass. I thought you were a touchdown whore?
Tags: Andre Johnson, Brandon Jacobs, Chad Ochocinco, Chris Henry, Chris Johnson, Darren Sproles, Eli Manning, Frank Gore, Greg Jennings, Jay Cutler, Jerry Jones, Marques Colston, Matt Schaub, Ray Lewis, Reggie Bush, Rex Ryan
